25 Takeaways from “How to Win Friends and Influence People"

Do you ever feel like your communication in English holds you back from fully expressing your ideas or connecting with colleagues?

For many non-native speakers, even advanced professionals, it can be frustrating to feel misunderstood or hesitant to speak up in high-stakes meetings.

One of the best ways to overcome these challenges is by focusing on relationship-building and effective communication strategies.

Dale Carnegie’s “How to Win Friends and Influence People” offers timeless advice that’s perfect for non-native speakers looking to boost their confidence and impact in the workplace.

Here are some actionable key takeaways that you can start applying today to enhance your daily communication, build stronger networks, and become a more confident speaker:

1. Treat People with Respect and Kindness

Respect and kindness are the foundation of effective communication in any language. When interacting with colleagues, clients, or managers, remember to use people’s names—it’s a small gesture that shows you value them.

Even when you disagree, maintaining a respectful tone is essential. Avoid unnecessary criticism or complaints; instead, focus on being constructive. This helps build trust and positive relationships at work.

Example:
Instead of saying, “That idea won’t work,” try, “I see where you’re coming from, but how about we try this approach?”

2. Show Empathy

Empathy is key to connecting with others, especially in multicultural environments. Try to understand the perspective of your colleagues or clients, particularly when cultural differences come into play.

Ask questions like, “How do you feel about this?” to show genuine interest in their thoughts. This not only builds rapport but also opens the door for deeper connections.

3. Use Persuasion, Not Force

In a professional setting, using persuasion and negotiation is far more effective than trying to coerce someone into agreement.

Whether you're presenting an idea or trying to resolve a disagreement, focus on appealing to the other person’s self-interest and supporting your points with logic and facts. It’s about finding a win-win solution rather than insisting on your way.

Example:
Instead of saying, “We need to do this my way,” you could say, “Here’s how this approach could benefit our project and save time.”

4. Build Relationships

Strong relationships are key to career success, especially in environments where cross-cultural communication is crucial. Find common interests with colleagues, whether it’s work-related or personal.

A great way to start is by expressing gratitude for their help or contributions. Building strong connections helps establish a supportive network, which is invaluable in any profession.

5. Practice Good Communication Skills

Effective communication goes beyond just speaking clearly. Focus on active listening—really pay attention when others are talking, and ask follow-up questions to show you’re engaged.

When speaking, be clear and concise, avoiding unnecessary jargon. Honesty and sincerity are key to fostering trust.

Pro Tip:
Before a big presentation, practice speaking aloud to work on your intonation and body language. This helps ensure that your message comes across naturally.

6. Make a Good First Impression

Your first interaction with someone can set the tone for your entire relationship. Whether it’s an introduction during a meeting or your first day on the job, be friendly and approachable.

Smile, use their name, and ask open-ended questions to show genuine interest in them. This not only helps make a lasting impression but also signals that you’re confident and capable.

7. Understand the Power of a Person's Name

Using someone’s name when speaking to them is a simple but powerful way to build rapport. It makes interactions more personal and respectful.

On the flip side, avoid unnecessary criticism, as it can quickly damage a relationship, especially if you’re still building trust with your colleagues.

8. Show Appreciation

Appreciation goes a long way in professional relationships. Make sure to thank others sincerely when they help you out, and be specific about what you’re grateful for. This shows that you’re paying attention and value their contribution.

Example:
Instead of a generic “Thanks,” try, “Thank you for staying late yesterday to finish the project—it made a huge difference.”

9. Be Interested in Others

One of the best ways to build strong professional relationships is to show genuine interest in others. Ask questions about their work, their hobbies, or even their weekend plans.

Not only does this help you connect on a personal level, but it also opens the door for mutual trust.

10. Smile

Never underestimate the power of a smile! It creates a positive atmosphere and helps you come across as friendly and approachable, even in stressful situations. Plus, research shows that smiling can improve your mood, so it’s a win-win.

11. Pay Attention

Active listening is more than just hearing words—it involves truly engaging with the speaker. Show that you’re listening by nodding, maintaining eye contact, and giving verbal cues like “I see” or “That makes sense.”

This strengthens your connection with the speaker and helps ensure you understand their message.

12. Be a Good Listener

Great communicators are also great listeners. Avoid interrupting and give the speaker your full attention.

Ask follow-up questions to show you’re truly interested in what they have to say. This builds trust and encourages others to share their ideas more freely.

13. Give Sincere Praise

When you offer praise, make it specific and genuine. Instead of a vague “Good job,” highlight exactly what the person did well.

For example, “Your presentation was incredibly clear, and I especially liked how you outlined the key challenges upfront.”

14. Avoid Criticism

Rather than criticizing others, try offering constructive feedback. This means focusing on areas for improvement without attacking the person.

For example, instead of saying, “You didn’t do this right,” try, “I think we could improve this by…”

15. Admit Your Mistakes

Admitting your mistakes shows humility and helps build trust with your team. When something goes wrong, own up to it, apologize, and focus on finding a solution. This not only shows integrity but also sets a positive example for others.

16. Be Persuasive

Use persuasion and logic when trying to convince others. Present your ideas clearly, backed by data or facts, and appeal to the other person’s self-interest. This helps you come across as reasonable and solution-oriented.

17. Make Concessions

Sometimes, finding a compromise is key to resolving a disagreement. Be willing to make concessions when necessary, and focus on finding a solution that benefits everyone involved.

18. Give Appropriate Compliments

When complimenting someone, be sincere and specific. A well-placed compliment can help build rapport and strengthen relationships.

19. Use Storytelling

Stories can be a powerful way to illustrate your points and engage your audience. Use concrete examples and make your stories relatable to connect with your listeners on a deeper level.

20. Create a Positive Atmosphere

A positive, friendly tone in your communication can go a long way in creating a welcoming environment. Use enthusiasm to engage your team and maintain a collaborative atmosphere.

21. Be a Good Leader

Lead by example and treat your team with respect. Show appreciation, be decisive, and focus on building trust within your team.

22. Set a Good Example

If you want to inspire others, you must lead by example. Show the same dedication and respect you expect from your team.

23. Be Enthusiastic

Enthusiasm is contagious. When you’re excited about your work, it inspires others to follow your lead and bring that same energy to their tasks.

24. Maintain a Positive Attitude

A positive mindset is crucial, especially when facing challenges. Staying optimistic and motivated will not only benefit you but also inspire those around you.

25. Continue to Learn and Grow

Professional growth is a lifelong process. Stay curious, set new goals, and be proactive about finding opportunities to learn new skills and expand your expertise.

Keep Learning

Loved these takeaways? Don’t stop now—go even deeper with these insights from Part 1 of “How to Win Friends and Influence People” about How to Motive Your Team More Effectively. Click here to dive in!

Also, download your free audio training of the three must-know leadership communication skills for non-native speakers here.

Be a More Confident Leader in English

If you’re ready to elevate your English communication and executive presence, or if you're looking for training resources for the international leaders in your company, book a call today at TanniaSuarez.com, or learn more about my Leadership Communication Accelerator here.